tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post831020618102202171..comments2024-03-10T00:44:49.280-05:00Comments on This & That: Torah and China: On Marrying Your RapistSusannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-17654329017808017242012-03-02T18:10:25.063-05:002012-03-02T18:10:25.063-05:00Ah, that is an interesting explanation, Becky. Th...Ah, that is an interesting explanation, Becky. Thanks for sharing it.Susannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-85936541078483451892012-02-28T22:11:01.610-05:002012-02-28T22:11:01.610-05:00As what Amber and Wafa' said, sadly, this way ...As what Amber and Wafa' said, sadly, this way of thinking still hasn't changed in some parts of the world. <br /><br />In a very few cases, it has been used by young couples though, when they weren't allowed to marry if he "raped" her, then they might be allowed to marry, as she then couldn't marry someone else. <br /><br />In terms of why we are so intent on blaming the victim, I read a fascinating article a while ago. The author explained, that it's to do with our need for the world to be "fair" and "just". We want to believe that bad things doesn't happen to bad people, because it's the only way for us to feel safe. This won't happen to me, because I'm a good person. When we then hear about something bad happening to a person, if we assume he or she is a good person, well, then we are just as much as risk as they are, and we can't cope with that. So we try to come up with explanations as to why they "deserved" it, because then we are still safe.Rebekka @ Becky's Kaleidoscopehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08561986047548051036noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-8242752138008016752012-02-23T10:11:49.423-05:002012-02-23T10:11:49.423-05:00No, i didn't know that! Woooow! thanks for s...No, i didn't know that! Woooow! thanks for sharingSusannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-20221257843997328592012-02-23T10:08:53.979-05:002012-02-23T10:08:53.979-05:00Do you know that in some middle eastern countries ...Do you know that in some middle eastern countries if a rapist marries his victim then the charges will be dropped !! so scary .Wafahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01533307419295995833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-80527216741293466272012-02-22T08:57:39.857-05:002012-02-22T08:57:39.857-05:00Sanil, as always, a thought-provoking comment. I ...Sanil, as always, a thought-provoking comment. I wonder why society values men over women. Do women play into this objectifying culture by willingly dressing a certain way, posing a certain way, taking money to pose nude on magazine covers? You bring up good points and I found your comments about the OT way of life very interesting. <br /><br />Has there ever been a time when women were valued or are we always to be second-rate to the mighty man?Susannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-16220957213315726872012-02-21T13:16:48.001-05:002012-02-21T13:16:48.001-05:00For about the past couple months, I've been re...For about the past couple months, I've been reading the women of Genesis for a women's Sunday school class I'm leading. Oppression and power is a really common concern in marriage and sex for them, so for me the whole issue of rape in the ancient world has changed a lot. Is there any such thing as consensual sex in the ancient world, really? It seems like legitimate expression of sexuality in that world is a man coercing a woman to have sex so she will be slightly more than a slave, and an illegitimate expression of sexuality is coercing/forcing a woman to have sex without offering her the slight change in status. Put that way, it's actually pretty clear why not marrying her and therefore denying that status change is wrong and harmful. It seems like sort of the same thing is at play in the Chinese culture you discuss, though I don't really know anything about it so there's a lot of speculation there.<br /><br />Obviously we don't have that much injustice in our culture, and I don't really want to make the comparison as if I understand having to live in that. But at the same time, I wonder if the attitudes are still a part of our own culture too. It's not only that extreme behavior that's the problem, but also the more subtle issues of how society values men over women and tends to still treat us differently. Women are sexualized and objectified over here in our modern, "equal" culture, and yet we're surprised when we see women treated as objects rather than people in other cultures. There's a much bigger and more widespread problem that we all have to deal with even if we're not in these extreme areas.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07382787889525110718noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-13744898441164191462012-02-20T21:47:46.503-05:002012-02-20T21:47:46.503-05:00Interesting thought about how much are we products...Interesting thought about how much are we products of our environments...now I'm going to have to ponder this! :)<br /><br />Thanks for your comment. Yeah, awful story, huh?Susannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-26469047860397992482012-02-19T23:29:52.213-05:002012-02-19T23:29:52.213-05:00Wheeew....what a terrible story!
This makes me que...Wheeew....what a terrible story!<br />This makes me question whether it's true that people do have similar moral compass in their mind, being same human beings or that people actually are just product of environment and society. There were a notion in someone else' blog some time ago saying we didn't actually have the "free right to choose" and people do not bear the burden of sin that they don't recognize. Anyhow...we have to really push the level of thinking of people anywhere, especially in the area where people who don't think that there are other better options that what's dictated by society and culture, so that we can move forward to a better future. That happens in history, that should be able to happen again if we have faith and courage.observant observerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01854462112422242194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-21708750411751123922012-02-19T10:22:20.100-05:002012-02-19T10:22:20.100-05:00yes, good points. I wonder why we are so intent on...yes, good points. I wonder why we are so intent on blaming victims. :(Susannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03115294023069458287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-740924465958245224.post-1694753575499822282012-02-19T10:04:36.888-05:002012-02-19T10:04:36.888-05:00It's really disturbing to think that there are...It's really disturbing to think that there are some places where the attitude toward women hasn't changed that much in 6,000 years. I'd like to hope that things have changed somewhat in the last 40 years in China, but I have my doubts.<br /><br />And really, even though we legally our rights here, the attitudes of so many people are still terrible in their thinking towards rape victims. There's an underlying idea that the victim has done *something* to put themselves in danger. Worn provocative clothing, gone to a 'dangerous' place. It's disgusting. Not everyone thinks like that, but I know that I've encountered it in enough people to believe that it's more prevalent than we'd like to admit.Amberhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09002997517784638068noreply@blogger.com