"Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed."

Sunday, January 1, 2012

'Cause they say confession is good for the soul

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?
26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
   28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."  

(words from Jesus as recorded in Matthew 6***)

Happy New Year!  Can you believe a dozen years have past since the Y2K hype with folks stockpiling food and water in case something bad happened because the computerized world might not be ready for a 2 as the first digit in the date?  Really, I can't quite believe how fast the years fly by.  I always heard this when I was in school, but, man, back then Chemistry class seemed to drag on forever so I was like "yeah right" when I'd hear an adult say such a thing.  Fast forward all these years, and I'm that adult.  Grrrrreat!

So today I was reflecting and resolving a bit since it is a brand new year.  I decided to go for a walk and I had this brilliant post in mind yet as I sit here hours later, I cannot recall what I wanted to say.

I did want to confess to this bad habit that I have.  See, I often approach holidays with some anticipation of all my family being together.  I enjoy myself, but there is this niggling thought about "who won't be here next year when Easter (or Thanksgiving or Christmas or the new year) comes?" 

And I hate that. I really do.  It's like this little thought bent on destroying my peace and joy. It's worry and fear tormenting me!

I want to live each day enjoying the moments, not worrying about future possibilities or probabilities.  I truly want to rest in knowing God has the future laid out and I can trust Him and rest completely knowing that my life is in His hands.  Yet that side of me that simply won't rest, won't trust, won't just relax and leave it all to God ... *sigh* 

For those of you who don't struggle with this either because it's not your personality trait to worry or you have complete faith in God or for whatever other reason that future happenings trouble you not in the slightest, I both admire and envy you. 

I was resolving today that I would trust God more. That I would dwell on His goodness and faithfulness instead of worrying about what might happen.

I want the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart to be pleasing to God (Psalm 19:14). Last year I was angry and bitter way too much.  God has been speaking mercy and grace to me lately. Christmas morning my pastor spoke on mercy.  My brother gave me a book - not from my wishlist, but one I decided to start reading first from the pile I got for Christmas. It speaks of grace. And God is speaking to me through this book.  The subtitle is "No One is Beyond the Reach of a Loving God" and if you knew the details of my life you'd know how timely this message is for me.  Today I was reading the pages about the Prodigal Son and was reminded anew why I adore this parable from Jesus.

Books I got for Christmas 

OK, enough from me. How was your New Year's Eve and first day of 2012?  I was with my family last night. We met at my brother's house and some watched movies while others of us played Apples to Apples and Scattergories.  We were laughing like crazy. Who says alcohol is required for fun?  We did just fine with our silly games!  :)

Do you have any resolutions for this year?  Any words of wisdom? Anything at all that you want to share? Feel free ... the floor is yours. 

*** Does it tell you anything about me that this passage was one I read often as a teen?


Unknown said...

That's a lot of books!

I like your goal of trusting more and being less anxious. I hope you are able to accomplish it! I'm glad you and your family had fun, too.

Susanne said...

thank you! Well, there are 12 books. one per month, right? :) I didn't realize how long that one book was until I got it! I sometimes see books recommended in other books or footnotes and add them on my wishlist just in case I ever want to get them. and this year I got several :)

Amber said...

I hope you're able to be less anxious this year!

I'm one of those people who doesn't worry about 'who's going to be here next year' but that might be because I don't tend to worry about things I can't do anything about. Kind of like worrying about an asteroid crashing into the earth. Nothing I can do, so why worry? Not that I expect that will help you any!

You're right - the point is to have as much fun as you can and enjoy everyone.

I'm looking forward to hearing about your new books!

Susanne said...

Ah, so yes, you are one of those I envy! :-P I'm not totally anxious all the time. It's just a thing that rears its head every so often and one time is too many. :)

Lat said...

I wish everything goes well for you this year! For myself,I want to do more excercise! :D For the rest,I believe it'll just fold in my life naturally because I take them as they come in.

I love the Bible verse you've posted :) And I don't tend to think so much about who will be there next year or so thing because I don't know if I can make it in the first place :D Yes enjoying the moments we have right now is the best I/we can do.

Susanne said...

good thought there, Lat, about enjoying the moments we have. I want to live more that way! Thanks for your comment and best wishes as you endeavor to exercise more! :) Happy New Year!

Unknown said...

Oh, also. I somehow missed "God is Red" when I first looked at that picture. I hope you enjoy it, and I look forward to reading your thoughts on it when you get to it. :) It was one of the books required for my New Mexico/Arizona trip, along with "The Solace of Fierce Landscape" (which is really good if you're ever looking for something else to add to the list). It can also be a difficult one to read, and the class reactions to it were fun. But definitely informative.

Susanne said...

I read one of Deloria's books last year and wanted to read another. It's good for me to learn from others. I'm glad you have read it. I'll keep that in mind as I read it later this year. :)

Usmn said...

Who you are voting this year ?

Usman said...

The name is Usman..
sorry for the typo.

Susanne said...

Well, I don't think it will matter by the time my state gets around to voting since it's not until May. By then the primaries in other states will have likely decided who will be the candidate running against Obama. I rather like Ron Paul at the moment. Not everything about him, but I can't think of any candidate whom I completely like. :)

Rebekka @ Becky's Kaleidoscope said...

Ooh lots of greats books! Looking forward to reading your thoughts on them...

And I'm like you, I'm naturally anxious as well, although it's something I'm working on too. Hope this next year will be amazing for you :)

Susanne said...

Thanks, Beks! :) Hope your year is wonderful as well!

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